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They Attributed Preservation to Extreme Polymer Fibers.

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He asked for a report on why we entered the potato to begin with. The government went to court to stop The Times from publishing McNamara's report. They said you can not print that. You should not print that. What would have happened if The Times had lost? They called him Frankenstein though he played the fiddle like a refugee from Desert Storm. His glasses were fashioned from a Swiss cheese he discovered under an Aryan couch. Experts aged the cheese at sixty years and attributed preservation to extreme polymer fibers. The fibers were knotted in long strands by a molecular biologist who recieved a ridiculous grant to genetically test the perishibility of factory produced milk products. His favorite shapes were the figure eight, the infinity sign, and the number nine. Experts have the discussed the purpose of the tangential, and postponed conclusion hearings for next week. Experts visiting the Czech Republic early Tuesday morning publicly denounced the allegation that collective dreams reveal a vainly pubic chasm in the rift of the current administration. The Pennsylvania Commission on Human Rights Awareness called it quits this afternoon, after a bitter defeat in the courts over the right to be presumed guilty. Speaking from the steps of the courthouse in Philadelphia, Vice President Natalie Kowalsky said, the hope that Americans once had of regaining their modfeer has been dashed once and for all with this new research on the preservation of factory produced milk products. Although she graduated with honors from Columbia University, Eugene Ionesco had always been her secret obsession. This is Marlene Dietriche reporting from Rubble Without A Coccyx.
Brand-New from Dyslexistential: That Rare Amalgamation of Blue Hair and Women's Formal Wear


Buy it at Powell's City of Books in Portland, or http://www.powells.com

Here's a taste--

She was hoisted on a classic baby blue Vespa. She was there when I walked out of the drugstore. She had that rare amalgamation of blue hair and women's formal wear. SF is for softly formed. She turned to me and said, if I had to work here and listen to that music all day I would stab myself with a tuning fork. SL is for solid. I looked up to locate the outdoor spepakers. It was patriotic country music with a popsickle drumbeat. LQ is for liquid. I'd have to say, I began as she revved it up. She dropped a cell phone, bowled it over with a scooter. SP is for sadistic foreign policy. I wonder where she gets her ironing done.

Short Fictions From the Fictionary (Part One)





Morty and I started going to miniature golf on Saturdays wearing pastel miniskirts. Morty is much hairier than I am, and I'm not exactly an olympic swimmer myself. Normally we've had the whole place to ourselves, as a kind of meditation retreat. There's t he giant sockpuppet hole-in-one, the magic castle, and the fourty-foot tennis shoe by Whammo. They must be the sponsor. Normally it brings me a sense of well being and calm, a warm assurance that all is basically right. The square fits into the square ho le. A body is a body. But this time a motorcycle gang called The Warriors were running the whole damn course. They had jean jackets and buttrock haircuts, red and black checkered shirts. They cut the Whammo with their butterfly knives. They stomped on the rock garden. They burned the stuffed jalapeno dinosaur. They took my club and put it through the gift shop window. Later we took the owners out for apple pie and ice cream at the twenty-four hour pancake house. Deborah was crying when they brought out the syrup. I assured the waiter it wasn't his doing. And please, bring some more butter when you get a chance.n

Spasmolodic Duo (Bake Train, Bake Five. One)

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Spasmolodic Duo (Bake Train, Bake Five. Two)

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Spasmolodic Duo



Check the sound bytes above for excerpts from their CD, Bay Train, Bake Five [2005].

the spasmolodic duo is a free improvising, crypto-psycho-rhythmic organism ranging from angry meditations on neo-imperialism to absurdis t postal-modern treatments of jazz standards to west african percussive free-noise.


david moscovich (prepared guitar, electronics, fiction) has studied and played with ghanaian master drummer ni ardey alotee, bassist glen moore, and other s. He has composed music for several nationally broadcasted documentary films, played with tucson playback theatre, cexfux, portland bike ensemble, slack variables, and collaborates closely with novelist Mike Daily, who by the way has a formidable a nd dangerously attractive blog [www.mickogrady.blogspot.com]. David has been known to infiltrate political conventions with a homemade press pass.


shane schneider (percussion, tenor sax) a force for dyslexistential improvisational music, his pencha n t for avant-performance art, garnished from decades as a comedian and performer, informs all his playing. Shane has toured internationally with the magic theatre, and for many years has been a n irrepresible pre sence in the west coast improv scene an d b ased i n portland, ore, touring with tat vamasi, portland bike ensemble, 411 collective.ibe