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Reading Malamud


This section struck me as terribly funny and all too true. The emphasis on the word just at the end is the truest and funniest part of all. How two or three months is still a long bit to labor over a manuscript, working and reworking the sentences, the paragraphs, the word choices constantly, as most of us do. The timing of his sentence he sets the reader with a great and verifiable punchline, that sounds initially like two or three months working diligently is a major effort, and the last of it. But the reader gets the idea that this is more like a cycle that has gone on and on, as he reveals at the end of this excerpt. A writer sees time differently in the long run, because there is only the long run. The sprint is for the poets, or so I think until I am reminded by Coleridge that "I should not think of devoting less than twenty years to an epic poem." Thanks, Bernard, for putting things in perspective:
"He entered his three-windowed study, raised the cracked green shades without looking into the street and arranged himself at his desk. From the top drawer he removed a portion of the manuscript. Harry felt a momentary sense of loss, regret at having given his life to writing, followed by a surge of affection for the imaginative self, as he read yesterday's page and a half and found it solid, sound, going well. The book redeemed him. Another two or three months ought to finish it. Then a quick last rewrite of the enterprise--call it third-and-a-quarter draft--in about three months, possibly four, and he'd have it made, novel accomplished. Triumph after just ten years."
-Bernard Malamud, from The Tenants
eXfoliation was a success! The new quarterly reading series at bookculture on 112th street between Broadway and Amsterdam in Manhattan. The next eXfoliation (winter edition) will be Wednesday, February 18, 2015.

This November 6th, LOUFFA PRESS was more than pleased to present eXfoliation: two poets and two writers of prose at bookculture. Hosted by David Moscovich and Justin Maki.

eXfoliation November 6th, 7PM @bookculture, 536 W 112th St (NY,NY) Subway 1: Cathedral Parkway/110th St FREE

featuring:

A. H. JERRIOD AVANT, poetry

MATT DOJNY, fiction

AMY FUSSELMAN, nonfiction

CLAUDIA SEREA, poetry


eXfoliation was a success! The new quarterly reading series at bookculture on 112th street between Broadway and Amsterdam in Manhattan. The next eXfoliation (winter edition) will be Wednesday, February 18, 2015.

This November 6th, LOUFFA PRESS was more than pleased to present eXfoliation: two poets and two writers of prose at bookculture. Hosted by David Moscovich and Justin Maki.

eXfoliation November 6th, 7PM @bookculture, 536 W 112th St (NY,NY) Subway 1: Cathedral Parkway/110th St FREE

featuring:

A. H. JERRIOD AVANT, poetry

MATT DOJNY, fiction

AMY FUSSELMAN, nonfiction

CLAUDIA SEREA, poetry

Bookculture is located on 112th Street between Broadway and Amsterdam in Manhattan. Louffa Press is featured in the newly appointed small press section at Bookculture.

Last night the Academy of American Poets held a Chancellor's reading at Skirball Center NYU.

It was breathtaking to see these poets read. Jane Hirschfield and Edward Hirsch, Claudia Rankine and Juan Felipe Herrera among others. That is an adjective I think I have never used before to refer to any reading. But if you examine the list of poets from the evening you may understand why. Tonight is an event free and open to the public...what a city AMERICAN POETS PRIZES CEREMONY & RECEPTION, 7:00 p.m.-9:00 p.m. Celebrate this year’s recipients of the American Poets Prizes, given by the Academy of American Poets, with readings by Brian Blanchfield, Luigi Bonaffini, Rigoberto González, Robert Hass, Hannah Sanghee Park, and Tracy K. Smith. A public reception with the poets and presenters will follow the ceremony. This event is free and open to the public. The Auditorium at 66 West 12th Street, The New School

When someone goes to the trouble of stealing your $249,999.99 ebook, you have to ask yourself "Do I have to ask myself?" When someone goes to the trouble of stealing your $249,999.99 ebook, you have to ask your friends, who will then ask you. When someone goes to the trouble of stealing your $249,999.99 ebook, you may have to seek therapy in the form of sucking on the fins of a silver oyster, which is not an oyster at all, because oysters do not have fins. When someone goes to the trouble of stealing your $249,999.99 ebook, you have to bill them for the remainder. When you bill them for the remainder, they will try to cancel the bill, which is relatively simple, because they just hit the "cancel" button. When you bill them for the remainder, they will hit the "cancel" button, and then you will receive a notice that tells you they have cancelled the bill, then you will contact the website. When you contact the website about the theft, they will tell you that they do not believe your ebook has been stolen, because they do not believe that your ebook could have been on sale for $249,999.99. Then you compose a series of Twitters asking them questions that they ignore for the rest of the short lifespan of their website, because they can make a lot more by selling your ebook without your knowing it, without giving you any of the cut. Then, one hundred years later, in stolen ebook court, you plead your case in front of a judge. The judge awards you -- a single printed copy of your own ebook, which the court has deemed that you may read only once, to yourself, silently, after which it will self-destruct, never to be seen again, not even in the library of Borges. The end.


Once ipon a time, I had a professor whose reading packet held an unusual title: CRAFT OF FICTIPON. I understood immediately that he had sprung on us a brilliant neologism. FICTIPON: (n.) to pontificate ipon the craft of fiction.

When someone goes to the trouble of stealing your $249,999.99 ebook, you know you're doing something right. When someone goes to the trouble of stealing your $249,999.99 ebook, which they "bought" by leaving behind $.01, you have to send them a bill for $249,999.98. When someone goes to the trouble of stealing your $249,999.99 ebook, they will have no trouble canceling your bill for $249,999.98 on the prick of their screen. When someone goes to the trouble of stealing your $249,999.99 ebook, you have to laugh. Or else


Well here is an update on my stolen ebook. It has crossed over in to hillariousland. The hacker has revealed his/her method for stealing the stolen ebook via email -- a simple discount code! Of course. Because discount codes for $1/4 million ebooks are readily available at the click of a button. Code being the operative word here. There was definitely code involved. Coding, obviously. Good job, Mr./Ms. Hacker. This provides a new ending for the life of the book itself. I wonder, does the hacker think I actually expected the book to sell at 1/4 mil? It surprised me that anyone would go to that length just to see what is on the other side. A reader willing to go to any length to get their hands on my book, even if they have to spend hours running through algorithms to come up with a code that breaks the quarter million dollar BUY button. Well done! Abby Hoffman would be proud. Anything for another fix of language, anything for another read. Or maybe I am wrong -- it took seconds, and the hacker read through the 150 pages of the ebook in one sitting. How will history look back on this moment? The world's most expensive literary ebook priced at $1/4 million, hacked in minutes. An experiment bound for failure of course. But who was expecting success? Apparently, in the hacker's mind, there was an expectation of success, if success is defined by the "sale" of the $1/4 million ebook. And by thwarting this perceived "success" he/she has fomented failure. But what a sad, stifled definition of success that would be. Imagine: success for a writer would be based only on the notion of sales, of revenue. There could be no emptier notion of success. The "failure" of this world's most expensive literary ebook would not be that it was hacked into and obtained for only 1 cent -- a broader thinker would quickly see the entertainment value behind this action, and the -- dare I say -- successfulness of an ebook as measured by its desirability -- and if we are to measure desirability of an object based on what risks people are willing to take to obtain such objects, well then my friend, this ebook is the very model of success. The hacker is willing to risk everything to obtain this object, this electronic book, priced at $249,999.99. So thank you for upping the ante on the desirability of my content. And by the way, you owe me $249,999.98.

Today I found out my ebook for $249,999.99 was somehow hacked and bought for 1 cent. There will follow a relentless string of emails until I get my ebook back. How can I repossess an ebook that was supposed to sell at a quarter million dollars that someone hacked for 1 cent? Good luck to me. The funny thing is, as part of the ebook there is an explicit legal statement that "The Purchaser" may be denied delivery of the ebook for any reason whatsoever. And the fact is that there was no legal sale at all. If glassware is on sale with a pricetag of $15.00, a legal sale would be the payment of $15.00, without which no sale occurred. So I really don't understand why someone would try to scam an ebook for 1 cent, with a pricetag like one quarter of a million dollars. (Others might ask why is an ebook priced at such a ridiculous price? Because it's gold, dammit, pure gold!) The legal disclaimer which is part of the advertising for the book as well as the ebook itself also indemnifies me, the author, for anything, explicitly stating that the $249,999.99 pricetag entitles the Purchaser only to one single copy of the ebook to be read silently, and alone. It's like the joke: How do you make god laugh? Tell him you have a plan. But I wonder what could be the motivation behind this buyer -- an avid reader? or just a hacker who wants to resell for profit. After a simple internet search has been revealed to be behind several scams. The ebook was bought on the site where I uploaded the ebook -- payhip.com. It was purchased by DigitalGoodsStore@outlook.com. Whatever resources they are using to scam me out of my ebook, I have no idea. But anyone has the right to price their ebook at whatever they want. It is for the moment, a mystery to be solved. Life goes on.

Worst Dildos of 2014*

*Based on research by an independent, bipartisan female pleasure consumer advocacy group in Chicago, Illinois.

Two Stars:

"Denis Johnson"

"Father Death"

"Political Asylum"

"Apollo IV"

"Calligraphy"

One and One Half Stars:

"Sickle of Glass"

"Blood Sauce Age"

"Youthquake"

One Star:

"Ex-California-Burr"

"Sun Cell Block"

"Greasy Duck"

One Half Star:

"Delight My Fire"

"Grand Mal"

"Used Car Salesman"

No Stars:

"Buttered Ram"

"Service Job"

"ICBMMM"

Minus One Star:

"Broadway Lafayette"

Minus Two Stars:

"Piranha"


So the idea came to me to do The First William S. Burroughs Centennial Tribute of Lincoln, Nebraska on Friday June 6, 2014. Now, the idea is that this is the "first" centennial celebration because like any annual or biannual celebration, the first one implies that another will also occur. As for the plans for the "second" otherwise known as the Bicentennial William S. Burroughs Tribute of Lincoln, Nebraska, that is up in the air. The calendar has not been booked that far in advance, and I will also be -- out of town for that one, barring a huge jump in cryogenics research that will affordably allow me to freeze my brain and thaw it (note, the word de-thaw does not exist, despite its irksome usage). New York has one, London has one -- why not Lincoln, Nebraska. It's closer to Lawrence anyway. For now, the idea remains one loosely composed of two elements thusfar: 1. Tiny Tiny Tongues (Joseph Jaros and David Moscovich) and 2. Joe Younglove (Joe Younglove) and 3. You The venue and full lineup will be posted as soon as these things have been arranged.
The frozen Hudson river December 2013. Photo by David Moscovich.

So, de repente I've been invited to join the “My Writing Process” blog tour and have completamente accepted the maravilloso invitation from Eckhard Gerdes for April 14 (today). Thanks, Eckhard. You can check his blog post here: www.egerdes.wordpress.com.

Mitte kudasai! The blog post is totemo simple. I must follow the three mitsu steps below and post to my blog on the date given. Understand? Of course I do. Mochiron. Acknowledge the person who invited me Boku wa and that the post is part of the "My Writing Process" blog tour (ue), answer the 4 yotsu questions which are provided below, then nominate up to three authors to follow with short bios and blog burogu links rinkusu for all. Pafekuto!


1) What am I working on?

HEALTH MATTERS: I am working on my deltoids and my abdominals, which is tough with my fabulous, soon to be patented Moscovich All-Carb 20th Century Masterplan. That's right -- it's not a diet, it's a Masterplan. A lot of people are crazy for this low-carb and paleolithic diet and I have decided to go the other way -- it's bread and pasta and granola bars and anything beige, brown and tasteless all the way. I'm taking a stand -- no protein, no fiber, virtually no nutrition. I am also alternating the all-carb diet with the paleolithic diet, for the sake of balance and occasionally smartening up with one of those green algae brain-booster drinks. One week carb, two weeks caveman, loads of B-vitamins and B-movies. As a result, I look exactly the same as when I was in the fifth grade, but with smaller glasses.

MEMORY: I am working on remembering things. Things like, "Librarians are not secretly nymphomaniacs." Things like, "Plants and people are two different things." Things like, "Never put a down payment on a featherduster." Things like the fact these are all quotes from my novella You Are Make Very Important Bathtime.

STATISTICS: I am working on statistics. For example, did you know that 98% of US-based businesses use social media? And did you know that 98% of Catholic women use birth control? I am sure you noticed that 100% of these statistics have not been cited or sourced and that JK Rowling did not write them. Thank you for noticing all of that.

NOVELS, ETC: I am packed to the hilt with projects, as usual. As I do the work on writing it feels more like The Work, rather than just work. I am working on two novels right now. I am too superstitious to speak to them in detail before they are published, but in more general terms, one of them is a revision of a process I began in 2006, and the other is a fresh new take on a story I have been telling my entire life. I am also working on a book of poetry and a couple of screenplay treatments based on my flash fiction novella which was published last year, called You Are Make Very Important Bathtime. The treatments are connected to the novella in varying and probably disturbing ways. One of them is a horror spoof, another is a drama treatment, and a noir. They all use the characters in the novella but bring out different characterization and in some cases wildly diverging plotlines. I am finding a certain freedom in writing the screenplays that doesn't exist when writing a novel -- knowing that it won't be read word for word as the finished product itself, and in fact taken to a different medium entirely. I have also noticed something new arise since working the film angle of things. I no longer think that working on a screenplay is antithetical to literary work, now that I am doing it, it seems to be there like a trampoline I get jump on whenever I want a break from the literary work. That probably means I have workaholic tendencies. My muse is a slave-driving sadist with no concern for physical or mental well-being.

WRITER SUBMISSIONS: I have also been working on submissions for my Louffa Press single author chapbooks project, as well as the online E-asy Journal for Louffa Press, called Scrubbadubdub, which are both ongoing and accepting submissions between September-June each year.

THREE-DIMENSIONALITY: I am working on being less three-dimensional and less predictable. I have noticed that many of us in this day and age are under the impression that being a person in three-dimensions is better than being an image on a flatscreen. Ideally, I would only appear on a flatscreen or as a hologram or on the side of a mirror when you need a mirror. But that would be funny and possibly even confusing if when you needed a mirror you saw David Moscovich in the mirror instead of yourself. Then again, it might not be funny at all.

TEACHING AT NYU: I am working on a syllabus for teaching a class at NYU, Intro to Fiction and Poetry which will commence in the Fall of 2014. The class is divided more or less as half craft and half workshop. We are going to explore a few of the more impactful writers of the last century, and the other half of the course is concerned with fomenting interest in the art of writing itself by doing it and workshopping it.

TEACHING IN PUBLIC SCHOOLS: I am working on a book launch for some very bright and creative students at PS110. The book to be launched is an anthology of student work for which I am Editor-in-Chief. There will be two 4th and two 5th grade classes reading from the work they have created as a result of the Writers in the Public Schools Fellowship which I am happy to be part of at NYU. It will take place on May 31st at Barnes and Noble Union Square starting at 1:30PM. There will be some very talented kids sharing their work in the bravest way.

NEW WORK: I have work forthcoming in July in Asymptote, which just went live with their new April issue: http://www.asymptotejournal.com/index.php

CALMING DOWN: I am working on calming down after a few recent fun things happened, such as my work being shown at the London Biennial and in Rome as well, which was exciting, projected large on an outdoor wall. I am working on calming down while writing and rewriting a novel. I am working on calming down after a really fun book launch for Bathtime which was held at Quimby's in Chicago (Friday, Sep 13) and then Cake Shop in New York, last October 23. I am working on calming down after a recent MRI scan. I am working on calming down.

2) How does my work differ from others of its genre?

My work is exactly the same as everyone else's work, only it's completely different. See above.

3) Why do I write what I do?

I write what I do for exactly the same reason as everyone else, only for precisely the same completely different reasons. See above. See below. Watch for falling rocks.

4) How does your writing process work?

Yes, it does work. See above. And thank you for the questions.

Want to do it? Thank you! Arigato! Mulțumesc! Touche!


Sweet Potatoes by David Moscovich Sweet potatoes are wonderful philological inventions, according to my computer virus sweet potatoes are located in a barnyard sweet potatoes are only four and a quarter today sweet potatoes are that the variety commonly grown here quite frequently tastes sweet potatoes are difficult for social and economic reasons but varieties with improved keeping qualities sweet potatoes are currently being conducted by the lsu agricultural center sweet potatoes are to highlight their versatility sweet potatoes are not only sweet potatoes are a very slow sweet potatoes are due to increased technology which changed the way people could prepare them sweet potatoes are $400 million a year sweet potatoes are flavored with brown sugar sweet potatoes are that they are delicious sweet potatoes are necessary for sweet potatoes are good for me sweet potatoes are stable compared with prices of highly perishable vegetables sweet potatoes are added sweet potatoes are easy, В В В just drain off the hot water sweet potatoes are concentrated in the stretch from thanksgiving to christmas sweet potatoes are rapidly expanding sweet potatoes are confusing; what is labeled a "yam" at the supermarket most likely is an orange sweet potato sweet potatoes is good sweet potatoes are just so sweet sweet potatoes are like the difference between cats and dogs sweet potatoes are rust sweet potatoes are here to help you treat your child to affordable style sweet potatoes are usually done between 90 sweet potatoes are about 85 degrees fahrenheit with 90 to 95% relative humidity sweet potatoes are to form latkes or potato pancakes sweet potatoes are to heal cuts and bruises quickly sweet potatoes are coming closer to commercial reality as the result of a co-pay computer virus that is taking over the internet sweet potatoes are in the microwave sweet potatoes are not especially innovative sweet potatoes are taken to new heights in this simple yet sophisticated casserole sweet potatoes are up from the sweet potatoes are featured in springtime in seville sweet potatoes are one way to increase kenya's food security sweet potatoes are better than dessert sweet potatoes are a standard procedure prior to storage sweet potatoes are to peel them and slice them about 1/4" thick sweet potatoes are taken to new heights in this simple yet sophisticated cass sweet potatoes are mid sweet potatoes are their versatility when it comes to utilizing them in recipes sweet potatoes are that they also provide micronutrients sweet potatoes are with cream sweet potatoes are to bake them at 350 to 375 degrees until they are soft and tender sweet potatoes are located in a sweet potatoes are fun and quite productive for the amount of labor spent sweet potatoes are such a precarious enterprise sweet potatoes are the health benefits like being high in beta sweet potatoes are estimated at 13 sweet potatoes are estimated at 11 sweet potatoes are that they do not grow locally sweet potatoes are china and it is the second most important crop in japan where it is used for the production of starch sweet potatoes are not recommended sweet potatoes are to cure them first sweet potatoes are one of my thanksgiving cookery jobs because this dish was such a favorite in my family and only a born and raised day can sweet potatoes are a wonderful sweet potatoes are the standard to which all other sweet potato dishes must rise to meet sweet potatoes are 55 to 65 degrees f with 85 to 90% relative humidity sweet potatoes are all naturally occurring sodium sweet potatoes are not worth the effort sweet potatoes are not a subject we know much about sweet potatoes are a small agricultural industry that has done well sweet potatoes are a good sweet potatoes are a wonderful combination giving you a great way to enjoy the many health benefits sweet potatoes are relatively new sweet potatoes are lower than most other garden vegetables sweet potatoes are delivered to the central virginia food bank in richmond sweet potatoes are expected to fetch between $5 and $10 sweet potatoes are cook sweet potatoes are thin and smooth and the colour patchy sweet potatoes are one of the largest producers of sweet potatoes in the usa sweet potatoes are poured into a pan of sizzling melted butter to produce a puffy and custardy pudding sweet potatoes are swimming in butter and smothered by marshmallows? think again sweet potatoes are necessary to get the syrupy sweet consistency sweet potatoes are merely an illusion sweet potatoes are donating $1 sweet potatoes are just what you'd make for your baby if you had the time sweet potatoes are over

Performance Concept for a Japanese Public


The Dropping
Here is a performance concept for a Japanese public that occurred to me recently. It has its basis in my knowledge of Japanese culture and a curiosity for testing the limits of the kata, and Japanese behavior in general. This performance is intended specifically for a Japanese public but could probably apply to other cultures, although not with the same effect. This performance concept is based on the idea that in Japanese culture, when a person drops an object, it is polite to pick it up and hand it back to them if a witness to it.

Location: Street, Train, Bus, or other public place

Idea: Performer drops an object (handkerchief, lipstick case, matchbook, lighter, etc) in the presence of other people. Performer does not pick up object but waits instead for someone to hand it to them.

Performer may repeat action any number of times, or go to another location and drop another object or the same object, wait for someone to hand it to them or offer it to them. Ideally, the performer would be walking and dropping objects on a busy street, so that several people would offer the object back to the performer.

This performance concept is copyright © 2014 by David Moscovich, all rights reserved. Use of this performance concept is permitted only with proper credit to the original concept by David Moscovich. Contact david at louffapress .com to use this idea for a performance.

Thank you.
SURREALIST MANIFESTO REMIXED BY DAVID MOSCOVICH

PROJECT DESCRIPTION This performance is based on an excerpt from The First Manifesto of Surrealism by Andre Breton, written in 1924, which concerns Breton’s approach to writing surrealist composition. The performance is a remix and collage of a live, non-linear reading with a video projection of the same text, rendered in color for the big screen. The text is reordered into 11 different permutations, so that each remix or permutation contains the text placed out of its original space. It then is dismantled then reconfigured visually, with characters juxtaposing and superimposing for the video. The text is approached as a medium of surrealism itself, and is molded in the shape of a re-reading as if directly from dreams and the subconscious. The text is meant to be read aloud in the precise spirit of Breton’s original instructions on surrealist composition, with the visual remix of the video projected behind the reader, and for simultaneous broadcast on the radio of the spoken delivery. The original text is not to be read, only the remixes. The voice then, will triangulate the visual collage of the surrealist manifesto.